Trip to Arkansas

Still playing catch up....

A few weeks ago we went to Arkansas to help Emily move into her apartment for her last semester of college.  J.David and I left Friday morning so we could take the extra day to visit our friends that recently moved to Little Rock.  It was so great to see them, their new baby, and their beautiful new home! Thanks for letting us come hang out and spend the night!  We had a blast!

Saturday morning we drove to Searcy to help Emmy (as JD calls her) move in and spend the day with Mimi and Jay Pops.  It was a fun trip that went by way too quickly, but we were happy to spend time with all the family we got to see.  Here are some cute pics from our trip, out of order, of course. 

JD and Asher loved playing with the dogs' kennels.  JD thought this was soooo funny!!!

A pic for Auntie Em...she taught him this "trick" in honor of her all time favorite movie!

J.David loved trying to walk around with Papa's cane.  So funny!

A sweet pic with Papa. 

The only pics I have of Asher and JD together...busy, busy boys!

Any Day Now...

This is the title I wish I was writing about today. Today was our official due date for Alexander. Today is the day I have dreading since March 3. I kept telling myself it would feel more real after this date, that after 8/22/09 I would suddenly put together in my head and heart that our loss in March means that our baby will not be joining our family permanently. So, does it feel more real? How are we doing? I wish there was a clear answer to either of those questions. I wish I could put into words my thoughts and emotions, but when I sit down to write out the overwhelming feelings I have inside, my fingers freeze, and I am unable to put "pen to paper". So instead of trying to explain how I feel I will share this:

We have learned so much from our loss. Alexander has taught us so much and he was only here barely an hour. He has taught me the importance of showing sympathy and compassion where I once felt uncomfortable to do so. That sometimes when the perfect words seem unattainable, a simple hug may be all that one needs.

He taught me to love the life I am living because I am not exempt from the bad. I found it too easy to think that I was invincible. Bad things happened to other people, but not me! WRONG! Bad things happen to everyone. I needed that reminder. I needed to be reminded that all the beauty in my life is a blessing from the Lord, and that it is simply a blessing to be living it. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I want to make the most of today before I find out.

The most important thing Alexander taught me/reminded me was to trust in the Lord. His plan for us far exceeds our own. This one hits the hardest because I am a big planner, one known for having "blue prints" of how I wanted MY life to go. Alexander would have been right on schedule...2 kids within 2 years...check! I may never know why this "fluke", as they called it, happened to us, but I do know that what happens next will be up to God. A decision I have to make every morning when I wake up.

I think of my sweet baby everyday. Thinking about how big my belly would be, if he would have been early or late, and most of all what he would have looked like. Would he have been like his big brother? Would he been laid back like his Daddy? Would he have been a good sleeper, eater? I think about him in Heaven looking down on us. Do I make him proud? Does he know and can he see how much we love him? I like to picture him as an angel protecting and comforting thousands of children and babies. It brings peace to my heart. He will forever be my son, I will love him, miss him, and think of him everyday of my life. I hope over time the number of days I re-live the horror of that night will slowly lessen and that it will be replaced by a peaceful remembrance of holding him during his last minutes. What a blessing my awesome God gave me that night. The only light in the darkest night I have ever seen. What a wonderful God we serve. Please continue to pray for my family and me as we go forward each day. Your prayers have been felt so deeply in our hearts. Thank you!

Anna Maria Island

My mom found this awesome vacation spot in a Southern Living Magazine. What a find! We spent a week hanging out, going to the beach, eating seafood, and most of all RELAXING!! It was an awesome vacation, thanks mom and dad for a great trip!!

J.David LOVED the ocean. He started off the summer timid in the water and is ending the summer a little fish. He would only walk in the sand if his shoes were on but wanted to be in the water all day long. He would wake up saying..."beach, beach, wa-wa, wa-wa!!" He liked to play with the shells but had no interest in getting his hands dirty with sand. ha ha ha. My little tidy man. He is still pretty up and down with what he will and will not eat, but go figure, he loved the Calamari!! WHAT?!?! So we got fried calamari appetizers and he ate it right up! This kid is going to send me to the crazy house with his eating...ha ha ha.

Morgan and I para sailed together one morning and what a beautiful sight!! (the scenery, not us of course). It was fun to do something like that together and see God's glory from 500+ feet in the air, while hanging from a parachute.

Some of our favorite things from the vacation were:

1. The beach of course

2. our awesome house (JD loved riding the El-ly (elevator) with Granny)

3. The all you can pancake breakfast on the beach (even though I never got the pancakes, I'm more a french toast person)

4. My Dad may rate this his FAVORITE thing: Skinny's burgers. A hole in the wall with the greasiest, yummiest burgers I've ever tasted...I only wish I were exaggerating. YUMMY!!

5. J.David going pee on Morgan in a little shop while waiting for our Catamaran ride. (swimmers diapers do NOT act the same as a reg diaper out of the water, which makes me doubt their ability in the water as well....yuck!!) It was sooooo funny!! they both had to get new clothes on the spot. Pricey, but hilarious!

Here are some pics, out of order of course:

"Playing" mini golf

Chasing the birds. Arms up screaming running towards them....entertainment for all those on the beach.

Looking out on the Catamaran

Chillin with Dad on the ride (side note: these are the new clothes)

Breakfast with Pap-pa

Morgan's sandcastle creation

Hunting for shells....in his shoes.

Beach Bum. And yes, he kept his hat, glasses and shoes on almost all day. My boy loves his accessories. ha ha ha.

Poor girls....

This is what you get when you put 6 adults, one toddler, and a week's worth of luggage into one expedition.

Mini-golfing, it took two of us to take this pic for some reason.

Drop Dead Diva

I know, I know, I've been promising vacation pics for 2 weeks now. I'm working on it, BUT this was a fun thing to post in the meantime. Morgan came across a preview for this show and DVR'ed (is it appropiate to use that a verb?) for me about a month ago. He thought it looked like something I would be interested in, and he was right! SO CUTE! It's on lifetime and is a cute chick flicky type show. Its comes on Sunday nights! Check it out!